Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Worse day of 2010 so far

Today is is my worse day since 2010 started. I cried many times today at different times of the day. cos i really cannot take the harsh tone and hosility of the person and the stress of closign the accounts by my own without her help. I felt helpless cos i really duno a lot regarding accounting. I felt bad that I kept forgetting things. I felt bad that I disappoint her. I felt useless. I felt worse when i cannot control my tears. I cried in front of 2 guys while trying to stuff my lunch into my mouth. When I went to parts department to look for Dewi to return her the lunch money my eyes were red. so obvious that i cried. I felt upset.

At nite, called home to pour my woes to my Mom. hahaha. Really thank God that I have such wonderful parents who cares about me and loves me even though I'm a big girl now. I was like a baby, crying and pouring out my woes through the phone, blow my nose and continue to cry. I'm really glad she listened patiently and comforted me asking me to pray and ask God for stength and not to take her words to heart. My Dad also encouraged me in a surprising way! He told me to pray the Lord's prayer. He told me I had given him a birthday card with the Lord's prayer (in Chinese) on it and he has memorised it as he has been repeating it when he goes to work! hahaha. (I cant even remember I wrote him a birthday card) and he read every line to me and tried to explained to me what it means and try to encouraged me with the prayer. I'm really amazed by my Dad and really grateful. I'm even more amazed by how God has worked in my Dad's heart. My Mom and Dad asked me to pray before I go to work every day and ask for God to help me and strength me.

After the conversation, I felt really comforted and assured by God. Even though I'm going through tough times, my heart is delighted with my Dad's response and I really pray that his heart will continue to soften towards God and one day accept Him into his life.

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